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A Law of Attraction

June 25, 2009

I came across this passage while I was studying for my Communication III class:

 

Some scholars have argued that we are most attracted to people who confirm our identity. This confirmation can come in different forms, depending on the self-image of the communicator. People with relatively high self-esteem seek out others who confirm their value and, as much as possible, avoid those who treat them poorly. Conversely, people who regard themselves as unworthy may look for relationships in which others treat them badly. This principle offers one explanation for why some people maintain damaging or unsuccessful relationships. If you view yourself as a loser, you may associate with others who will confirm that self-perception. Of course, relationships can change a communicator’s identity as well as confirm it. Supportive relationships can transform feelings of inadequacy into self-respect, and damaging ones can lower self-esteem (Adler & Roman, 2006, p. 10).

 

So that’s why!

 

Reference

Adler, Ronald & Rodman, George. (2006). Understanding Human Communication (9th ed.). New York: Oxford University Press.

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